Top Ten Jobs For The Rest Of 2008
June 27, 2008
10. Bush/Cheney bumper sticker scraper
9. Tomato taster
8. Britney Spears spotter
7. Home school janitor
6. Smart Car washer
5. Dead pet funeral director
4. Priscilla Presley impersonator
3. Medicare-sponsored tattoo artist
2. iPhone addiction counselor
1. Gas Station Sign Price Changer
Wal-Mart Explores Indentured Servitude Employment Model
May 15, 2008
Bentonville, AR - For years Amanda Jacobson paid no attention the vagrants outside the Wal-Mart store she managed. Short of staff, and with no budget for more, suddenly the Will Work For Food sign held by a crippled veteran took on new meaning.
“I asked the bakery for the week old yeast rolls and headed outside,” Ms. Jacobson told reporters. “It was the beginning of a great relationship for the homeless and Wal-Mart. It’s a real win-win situation.”
Hiring panhandlers to work for food has proven to be a successful pilot program in several Wal-Mart stores. All amounts eaten are carefully tracked and translated into hours owed the company. The world’s largest retailer is known for keeping prices low for the consumer. This is just another aggressive price cutting strategy. “We think it’s genius,” said North American People Management Director, Walt Thompson. “This represents an amazing opportunity to help those in need while driving down prices and ensuring we’ve got the bodies to serve our customers.”
Thompson is working with the legal and tax divisions of the retail giant to determine if food distribution under the new employment model qualifies as a charitable tax deduction. Plans are already underway to expand the program.
Young mother Courtney Potter looks forward to the work-for-diapers program. “They don’t even make you interview,” she said.
Ohio Man Promotes Home-Based Oil Business
May 14, 2008
Rusty Grove, OH - With the price of a barrel of crude oil approaching $130, it’s not hard to see why thousands of wanna-be oil barons are flocking to the small Cleveland suburb of Rusty Grove and forking over $500 for a seat in a seminar called “How To Start Your Own Home-Based Oil Business” put on by Harold “Don’t Call Me Crude” Solowski, the self-proclaimed “Sheik of Shaker Heights.”
Solowski knows why the crowd is there. “Who wants to live in house with a snow machine in the attic so you can ski all year round? How would you like to drive a Rolls Royce to the bowling alley? Wanna see my titanium American Express card? That’s what oil can do for you!” Read more
Top Ten Ways to Become a Power Player
May 6, 2008
Often times, colleagues are too busy doing their jobs to recognize just how important you are. They fail to get your input on the latest big project or leave you out of a luncheon with your company’s biggest client.
Not only is this frustrating, it’s an attack on your ego and should be taken personally.
Here are ten quick ways to exert your power within your office and gain the respect you deserve from colleagues: Read more
