DETROIT, MI — General Motors Corporation (motto: “It’s the unions, stupid!”) has filed a lawsuit in a Michigan court against the Republican Party (motto: “It’s the unions, stupid!”) over the GOP’s use of the word “vetting.” “We’ve owned the phrase “Vetting” since 1953 when the first Chevy Corvette hit the streets,” said GM attorney Chuck “Barry” Sterr. “It has always meant one thing: driving over the speed limit in an expensive sports car with the sole intent of picking up women who are at least 20 years younger than you or your ex-wife. The GOP has been libeling the term ever since Sarah Palin was nominated as John McCain’s running mate.”
Sterr is referring to the less well-known – at least until recently – definition of vetting: a process of examination and evaluation. “When I first heard John McCain was vetting Sarah Palin, I said, “You go, Johnny Boy!” observed Greg Young, president of the Dime Box, Texas, chapter of the Corvette Clubs of America. “When I found out it meant he was talking to her, I knew he wasn’t driving a Corvette. It invalidates the warrantee to just ‘talk’ to a hot babe like that in a Corvette.”
Attorneys for the GOP, speaking by phone from Alaska where they will be working for the next two months, defended the party’s use of the term. Speaking for the group, attorney Lee Bargun explained, “According to Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts, who is keeping a close watch on this suit, General Motors is actually at fault here for dropping the apostrophe from the word “Vetting,” as in “Let’s go ‘Vetting in my ‘Vette. We are using the correct version without the apostrophe.”
The GOP’s attorneys have asked GM to drop the lawsuit or face a separate suit over the use of the motto “It’s the unions, stupid!” which the GOP has been using since the Reagan administration. The McCain campaign has no comment on the suit, other that to say the Republican candidate prefers to go “jetting.”