…who may or may not have a clue about how to run a business.
Dear Employees,
We’ve had a banner year. It’s great to lead such a motivated team that does whatever it takes to get the job done.
That being said, I’d like to remind everybody about our vacation policy. Most of you have two weeks…that includes vacation days, personal days, and sick days. If you’re going to be out, I’m going to need, at least, a two-week notice. Obviously, there are exceptions–you don’t always know when you’re going to be sick. But a doctor’s note will do just fine as long as you can hand it over for your personal file within 24 hours of returning to work.
Since I’m out of the office so often, I’m going to need you to cc my assistant whenever you email a vacation day request. He will track your vacation, personal, and sick days. Be sure to let him know when and why you want off.
Should you take a vacation day, please keep your cell phone nearby in case I have a question that needs an immediate answer. If you’re taking an extended amount of time off (five consecutive days), you must have daily access to your work email and check it, at least, once a day (preferably mid-day, anytime between noon and 3:00 p.m.). Obviously, I don’t expect you to be on the clock when you’re on vacation, but a quick check of your email will save me a lot of headaches. Because of the amount of time I spend out of the office, it’s difficult for me to stay in the loop with certain projects. There’s a good chance I’ll need you to update me on whatever projects you have going, even if you happen to be at the beach.
Again, I can’t thank you enough for all of your hard work. We’ve met all of our sales goals and have doubled the number of clients during the past year. That’s phenomenal. Let’s just make sure we’re all following the rules and keeping our time sheets in check.
Many Thanks,
Your Clueless CEO
PS…please submit your vacation requests on Mondays and Wednesdays only as Tuesday and Thursdays are my golf days and I’m out most Fridays.